Our daughter: A bully or a flirt?

We got our first bad report about our daughter at Mother's Day Out yesterday. Apparently, Elizabeth is really into tormenting the boys. Whenever the boys are lying down or sitting down playing on the ground, she goes over to them and sits on top of them. Yes, she sits on them, holding them down so they can't get up, until they start crying. And when this happens, she laughs at them. Oh no, what have we gotten ourselves into? Either she really likes boys (already?!!) or she's being a bully (really?!!) and likes to be mean to other children. Either choice doesn't seem too desirable to me right now. Who knows? Maybe she's both?!! What is a mother to do?

Pictures at 14 months

I finally downloaded my camera...287 images!! And now I'm uploading a few of those pics. I'm out-of-town right now and don't have them all on this computer, but I'll upload more later when I get back home. Here's our sweet Elizabeth...

Shane and Elizabeth eating at a restaurant in Waco on the Brazos River.

My 30th birthday! Wow!

BAYLOR BOUND!!!???

Last weekend we drove to Arlington to see our new baby niece, Eleanor Abigail. We stayed with my cousin Cody Walton and his wife Chesley one night. Elizabeth had a lot of fun playing with her (3rd?) cousin Garrett. By the way, Elizabeth now has FIVE cousins within 14 months of her older and younger. Wow!

This picture is on our way home. Elizabeth is hugging her two favorite stuffed animals--Bevo and her little lamb.

She says "Bevo" by the way. For all those who know Shane, this fact should come as no suprise.

I doubt any future composition Elizabeth does will be as sweet as this one. And she's so proud!

Thanks for the delay

So, I’m on a plane right now, typing on my new laptop (I’m quite excited that I can actually work on my computer without it being plugged in). In the past four years, every time I’ve traveled anywhere, I couldn’t use my computer because the battery never worked. Even when I got a new $100 replaceable one for Christmas, my laptop wouldn't work. Bizarre. Thankfully (??), that laptop died the other day and I got a new one!!!). But I digress. I just finished grading 14 essays from students taking my technical and professional writing class. I began today and ended today, thanks to a five-hour plane delay, no other responsibilities at the moment, no daughter running around me, and no dinner to fix. This task of grading a single set of essays typically takes me two weeks. Today, however, with this delay and my persistence to finish them before the conference I’m attending begins, I was able to finish grading them. Yippee!!

Not only did I complete the essays (on the plane. Right now, I’m somewhere over Tennessee on my way to Louisville), but I also got to see my dad. What a treat that was! He just happened to be in Houston today, which is unusual for the middle of the week, so I got to see him for a quick minute. He took me to Sonic (yum!) and we sipped our drinks together. I didn’t get my usual Route 44 vanilla Diet Coke, easy ice, though. Instead I got the medium size (of the same variety, of course) because I would have had to throw it away when I went back through security anyway. At least we can buy something there to bring on the plane. I have to have something to drink as I drive (non-alcoholic of course).

Shane called me a minute ago, and his first words were, “Do you want to know something that will make your heart break?” Hmm. Do I? All I want to know is if Elizabeth is all right? Is she? OK? Tell me whatever you want to now that I know she’s OK.

He proceeds to tell me that when he brought Elizabeth home from Amy’s today, she runs into the house and goes straight to the room that we call our office and bangs on the door, calling, “Mama. Mama. Mama.” When nobody answered, she starts banging on the master bedroom door. “Mama. Mama! Mama!” Still no answer. So, Shane opens the bedroom door to let her in. She runs into the room, looks around, and then runs into the bathroom expectantly. Nope, no Mama there either. So she sits down on the floor and cries. Then Shane asks her, “Ah, honey. Do you want to call Mama?” And she shakes her head yes. They call me, and I proclaim my love for her and how much I miss her and how much I love her and how I can’t wait to see her. Then, suddenly the phone goes dead. She had hung up on me. Now she has broken my heart.

Working Mom

Well here it is finally, a post:

I have been an official employee of Baylor University for three weeks now, and I am really enjoying my job. I like the intellectual stimulation it provides, the extremely bright students who are taking my classes and provide a dynamic learning environment, my colleagues, the research and writing (which is actually half of my job description), the Christian atmosphere, and that I am fulfilling a purpose that God has for my life--to make a difference in the lives of others.

I won't tell you that this transition from "work-at-home Mom" (working on my dissertation and teaching a couple courses) to "go-to-work Mom" has been easy, one empty of fears, tears, and prayers. I constantly think about this decision and wonder if I'm doing the right thing. Am I fulfilling God's purpose? How will this decision affect Elizabeth? Her view of me as a mother? Her relationship with me? How will it affect my marriage and the precious time I value with my husband? These are questions I/we struggle with on a daily basis.

Thankfully, God has still allowed me to stay at home (or, work from home) two days with Elizabeth and so we still get in some good mother/daughter time. And Shane is with her on another day, which is a tremendous blessing. The other two days Elizabeth stays with my good friend Amy and has grown to love her time spent over there. She especially loves their dog Chloe, which is good since Shane declares that our children will never have pets of their own (This may sound cruel, but he has his reasons, ones that are actually logical, rational, and realistic.). Elizabeth has probably transitioned better than either one of us. What a special girl.

So back to working...When I worked for ACU as an Admissions Counselor, I went through a period of soul-searching where I tried to figure out God's purpose for my life. And after much prayer, thought, reflection, and discussion with others, I figured out what it was: for me to make a difference in the lives of others. This sounds simple, and in a way, I guess it is. But once God led me to this conclusion, I have tried to fulfill this purpose, loving God and loving others, no matter what situation I have been in.

And, now, through this process of moving from "work-from-home Mom" to "work-outside-the-home Mom," I again find myself thinking about God's purpose(s) for my life and for my family's life. Having a husband and a daughter, while it does not necessarily change my view regarding God's purpose(s) for my life, does change the tangible and realistic meaning of what this purpose represents. And still our decision for me to go back to work explicitly ties into this purpose. While many moms feel they have to choose between the either/or decisions (working outside home vs. staying at home with children; being a mom vs. being an career woman; being active in child's life vs. being an observer), I hope that God will not force me to choose. I don't want to have to choose. Even though I value my family (and God, of course) first and foremost, I also have talents in other areas that God has given to me. And shouldn't I use these talents? I don't know. It's a constant struggle, to be honest. While I may be naive , I pray that God will fulfill His purpose in me and through me in many different arenas of life: as a wife, mother, friend, employee, daughter, colleague, and Christian. I want to give my all to God, Elizabeth, and Shane first and foremost, but I also want to give my heart and soul to my students, my writing, my career field, my friends, and my family as well. Can this be possible? I honestly don't know. But isn't Christian math different than worldly math? Can't 1 plus 1 equal 1? Can't I give all of me so that God's purpose works through me in various ways and arenas? Perhaps not in physical, mental, or emotional terms. But spiritually, I believe God can make this possible, if He wills it. And so I venture out into the workplace feeling the support of God and Shane and pray that His purpose will be fulfilled through my life. It is my prayer that God will continue to humble me, yet protect me; to teach me, yet shelter me in His arms; to guide me and form me into the person He wants me to be, yet do so gently. If what I'm doing or how I'm being does not add up to who He knows I can be or my purpose, then I hope that we will have the courage to make the changes we need to make.

Sorry to get so personal. I've wanted to post for a while but didn't really know what I would say because all these thoughts are going through my mind. And making the time to write here requires a little more effort, not only since I'm writing a lot at work, but also because when I get some time, I want to spend it with my family. Dear reader, I hope you will understand.

Introducing Brooklyn Allyson Reaves

Yesterday, Shane and I welcomed a new niece into the Poe family. Derek and Kim had their second child, a daughter whom they named Brooklyn Allyson. "Brooke" is Kim's middle name and "Lyn" is my mom's middle name and my grandmother's first name; hence "Brooklyn." And "Allyson" comes from our dear friend Allyson Beckering who died tragically in a car wreck twelve years ago when she was only nineteen. We miss Allyson very much, and it's so special that her memory is carried on in the life of such a precious child.

Brooklyn was born at 2:12 p.m. in Austin, Texas. She weighed 7 lbs, 13 oz. and was 19 3/4 inches long. She is a very beautiful baby and is born into a loving, caring family. We were there when Big Brother Barrett arrived and got to see him look at his sister and his mom and be excited that "Brooklyn come."

Congratulations, Derek, Kim, and Barrett, and a great big welcome to Brooklyn. We love you.

Changing Days

Finally, a post.

Two weeks ago today we took the pacifier away from Elizabeth. You may think that it's a little early for us to do this (I agree), but when the doctor told us, "It will only get harder as she gets older," Shane's logic agreed with her. Several days later he tells me, "I think we need to take the pacifier away from Elizabeth." What he meant was, "It's time YOU take the pacifier away from her." It's the same thing when he says, "I think WE need to call the doctor." What he really means is, "I think YOU need to call the doctor." It's that wonderful royal "We," the "we" that really needs me"

So I took it away from her and she cried, sobbed really, for 2 hours straight. I felt miserable. I didn't pick her up, but I went in there often to comfort her and rub her forehead, which she didn't appreciated and kept swatting my hand away. She wanted me to pick her up. She just didn't understand why she couldn't get something that she'd never gone without. And she didn't want to understand. I kept thinking, "It's just a paci. What's the big deal?!! I should just give it to her. I don't want her to feel like I don't love her. Just give it to her." I wanted to give it to her so bad; I just felt awful. But we've stuck with it and going on three weeks now, she has finally adjusted. It's been an EXTREMELY long three weeks without much time to write and without much emotional energy. Elizabeth is finally sleeping better but still doesn't go down for naps as easily as she did when she had her paci. But we're proud of her for adjusting and glad to be through this stage. I hope she doesn't start sucking her thumb (not that I have a big problem with this), only because we weaned her off the pacifier and don't want her to resort to some other form of sucking. If she does, well, I'll just have to give her the pacifier back.

A Brilliant Mind

Elizabeth has really made strides in the last few weeks in terms of what she can understand. Here are some examples:

• “Bring it to Mama.” She brings me whatever she has in her hand, typically something she’s not supposed to have.
• "Where’s your ball?” Not only does she know how to go and find the ball, but she also knows how to say the word.
• "Go throw it away” She proceeds to go the trashcan and dump the trash in it.
• “Move away from the dishwasher.” She loves to come up to the dishwasher when we are loading or unloading it, and because the knives are on her side, we have to give this command often.
• “Are you ready for your bath?” Her response: She walks out of the room we are in, goes into her bathroom, and waits in front of the tub for us to come in there.
• “Where’s your purse?” She looks around, finds her purse, picks it up, and then loops it on her arm and walks around the room.
• “Dance. Dance. Dance.” She responds by twirling around, shaking her body, and moving her feet really fast.
• “Stir your spoon.” She loves to pick up one of her cups and stick another toy in it and stir. When I’m cooking or baking, she always wants me to hold her and now she likes to stir.
• “Do you want to go see the horses?” She points towards the backyard and heads for the backdoor.
• “I love you.” She tells us she loves us by patting us continuously (arms, head, chest, leg, whatever). When she was six months old, we taught her how to “pat the Bible” and she has carried this motion over to tell us she loves us. It’s her sign for love.

Just as Elizabeth has progressed in what she can understand, we, too have developed in what we can understand:

• “Daddad" (Daddy)
• “Mom-mom” (Mama or Mommy)
• “Ga-Ga” (Granbarry or Granna)
• “Na Na” (Nana)
• “Go. Go. Go. Go.” (Go. Go. Go. Go.)
• “Sus at.” (What’s that?)
• “Uh oh.” (Uh oh.)
• Uh Uhhhh.” (Give me more or give it to me now or pick me up.)
• “ba” (ball)
• “yah” (yes)
• “hah” (hi)
• “bah” (bye)

Uncle Zach said recently, “She’s become brilliant overnight.” And I say back to him, “Not exactly. She has become even more brilliant overnight.” As only a parent would respond.

Reading again

I finished the first novel I’ve read since finishing my dissertation in April. I know it seems like a long time not to have read a novel (3 months); it is. But what’s worse is that over the course of my four-year program, I can count on both hands how many books of fiction I read of my own accord. It's not because I don't like to read fictional texts; I really do, although I'm not as avid a reader as others like my mom and sister who always have a book in hand and others waiting in the wing. Rather, the reason I haven’t read a novel in so long is because I was reading so many other kinds of books, books that required extra energy, an attentive eye, and a high level of retention. I had no desire to read other books.

Let me explain a little about how reading requirements in graduate school work. At least in my field, each course required you to read a book a week. And these books were not easy reads. They weren’t literary texts like many think we read in my field; rather, they were books about writing…theoretical books about writing, literacy, postmodernism, research, and the social movement. Heavy, heavy theory (interesting material, but it often overloaded my brain). And all this reading was in addition to reading numerous articles and writing regularly (reader responses, listserv posts, minor papers, and major academic essays). All this reading (and writing) was in addition to teaching two classes a semester, which, to put it in perspective, is how many courses I will be teaching this fall. I do have research/writing requirements, but needless to say, graduate school left little time for pleasure reading. You read what you had to and not much else.

And then came comprehensive exams. I had to take three exams, all of which had separate reading lists upwards of 100 texts each. I had about 6 months to put together these lists and then to read all the texts. Wow. Not much time for pleasure reading, although. I did get to take one exam that focused on a special research area in literature. I chose to read and analyze the literacy activities present in contemporary texts by American women. So, this did allow me to read 46 novels. And they were of my choosing, and I did enjoy them. But they were still for school.

So throughout the course of graduate school (coursework, comprehensive exams, data collection and analysis, and the writing of my dissertation) and my master’s program, which I finished the same month as I started my PhD, I actually lost all desire to read. Ok, ok. I still read, of course. I read about pregnancy, babies, Christianity, marriage, cooking, travel, and other items that interested me or that served practical purposes for specific times in my life, such as having a baby, growing herbs, or looking for a job. This type of reading—information-seeking, shall we say—didn’t require as much energy as it took to get to know new characters, new places, and new authors. So I still read such texts, but I didn’t read the fictional novels that filled booklists and bookshelves and that sat on my shelves accumulating dust and looking forlorn that I would not pick them up.

I felt guilty. I felt that I should still be reading such texts, even though I had little energy left to even scan my bookshelf. I had been influenced by my Victorian England and 19^th-Century American ones where reading was equated with moral worth and all good, moral people read. We look down on those who don’t read; we are a culture of “reading snobs.” Even though reading was what I did all the time and I wanted an escape from it, I still felt guilty about my lack of will to read.

I thought I had disliked reading all together and questioned what I was doing getting a PhD in Rhetoric and Composition. If I didn’t read on my own but only read what was required of me in school or when I needed information—more for pragmatic purposes than pleasurable ones—was I a fraud? How could I teach about reading and writing if I didn’t read much outside of the required parameters? The reading snobs and cultural ghosts haunted me, imploring me to pick up a novel and find meaning in the words. But I didn’t do it. I did read The Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons in the midst of all this, and I’m glad I did. (I highly recommend them both. I read The DaVinci Code in two days (with a six-month-old baby). Angels and Demons started off a little slow for me because it had a lot of scientific, technical, and mathematical concepts, which I don’t understand, but I enjoyed it immensely once I stuck with it. Shane thinks it’s even better than The Code.)

Once I decided to read the book (2 days ago) that I referred to at the beginning of this post, I had it read the very next day. The book, The Sunday Philosophy Club by Alexander McCall Smith, was recommended to me by Judy Seibert whom I met in June when Shane and I were in Abilene for his DMin Orientation. She and I got to talking about books and discovered that we liked several of the same authors, especially Barbara Kingsolver (made uber-famous through Oprah's book club) who wrote The Poisonwood Bible, Pigs in Heaven, The Bean Trees, and other thought-provoking books. Judy recommended Alexander McCall Smith, among other authors, and since I trust her judgment, I read it.

The book was engaging and enjoyable and definitely made me ponder moral questions the book raises (the heroine is a philosopher/academic who reviews and edits a journal, right up my ally). I'll definitely read more by this author.

I’m glad that I have finally emerged from my non-reading days to discover again the wonderful world of fiction. Today I went to the library and checked out some other books that I will read in the coming days. I hope I can learn how to balance reading for work (my job) and reading for fun and pleasure because I don’t want to miss out on all these good books just because I must read the “required” material.

Now, reader, my question for you is: Can you give me any reading suggestions as I re-enter the world of fiction?

Cousin Camp

My nephew Barrett has been staying with us since Elizabeth's birthday party last Saturday and we are having a mini cousin camp. My sister Kim is 8 months pregnant, and we thought it would be nice to give her a little break. He's here until tomorrow when my mom (who is also here, thankfully!) will take him back to Austin. It's a lot different with two kids who are only 14 months apart, walking everywhere, into everything, and who like to play with the same toys whenever the other one is playing with it. They are having a lot of fun together. Elizabeth is learning how to actually use the toys rather than pick them up out of the basket and throw them on the floor; Barrett is learning how to share and how to adjust to another person around. They get really excited each time they see each other and are giving lots of hugs to each other. Barrett calls Elizabeth, "Bet-tuh," and she calls him ,"Buh." It's much more difficult to keep a clean house with two, or maybe it's because Barrett is so much older and actually plays with the toys. Those blocks are all over the house. Nana and I are the ones in danger; we both almost wiped out from stepping on some toys. I seriously do not see how it's possible to keep a clean house when you have two little ones. Please, please forgive my house if you ever drop in on me. I used to keep it picked up and clean, but now, it's just not the same. And to be honest, it isn't that much of a priority for me now to spend all my time picking up the toys. I'll do it at the end of the day, but I'll let her have her fun. When she gets a little older, I'll teach her how to pick up after herself. We'll see if that works!! Any tips from any of you more experienced moms or housecleaners?!!
Yesterday all five of us went to Baylor and went swimming. Barrett and Elizabeth each had a great time swimming and watching "the big kids" go down the slide (You can see it in the picture; it looks like one at a waterpark). Barrett especially loved seeing Nana go down the slide (And so did we!!). Mom always was a daredevil; maybe that's where Elizabeth gets some of her fearlessness. We have learned that Elizabeth loves the water and so we try to let her swim as much as possible. She smiles and laughs the whole time. She has learned how to kick her feet when she's on her stomach and her back. When we're in the pool, it's the only time she will cuddle with us and let us hold her. Otherwise, she wants down and wants to be doing her own thing.

We also went to the doctor yesterday for Elizabeth's 1 year check-up. She weighed 22 lbs (75th percentile) and was 29 inches long (average). She got her shots, which weren't fun for her or her tender-hearted Daddy. Poor things! also want to write about Elizabeth at one year...She is a really independent girl and entertains herself with her toys. She loves people and is extremely outgoing. She will not let us feed her anything but will eat it anything we put in front of her, only if she is allowed to put it in her mouth herself. She loves all types of food and drinks a lot of water, too. She is still taking 2-3 naps a day, depending on what we are doing. She is still finding more wallpaper border to eat off the wall. We have just given up on teaching her not to eat it. Poison Control tells us it's not THAT bad for her, so we'll just let her do it. It will all be gone soon enough, and we will NOT be putting it back up. We, too, can learn some lessons. ;)

It should come as no surprise that Elizabeth likes chocolate and sugar. She devoured her birthday cupcake and didn't seem to know what hit her. It was the only time she got more on her mouth than on her bib. Like I said, she's a smart girl! :)One of my previous posts mentioned that she was a climber and that has only increased with age. She climbs on every toy she has and on all our furniture. She always has bumps and bruises on her as a result. I dread the day her attempts to climb out of the crib become a reality. And she doesn't really like to be told "No." Who does, right?!! But she seems to be a little more stubborn and strong-willed than other children her age. Everybody tells us that we have our hands full. When she gets mad or frustrated, she lets out a "Ughhhhh" and throws both arms down to her sides with her palms parallel to the ground (that's hard to describe).

She sure is sweet, though. Now that she's facing forward in the car seat, every time I get out to get her, she grins at me and just laughs like we have an inside joke or something. She knows how to throw trash away and how to bring me things when I ask her to. I have vegetables in pots on my back porch and one of Elizabeth's favorite things to do when we're outside is to take the "label stakes" and move them around from pot to pot. She puts one down in the potting soil and pulls it back out and then moves it to another. It's very cute.

It's funny how much we have learned about ourselves since our daughter was born. At church on Sunday, for instance, I was trying to hold her to go to sleep (which is a feeble attempt at best--she MUST be lying down in a bed to do this). Her cries were distracting everyone (so I eventually took her to the nursery). After church I was expressing my frustration about this to Shane, and I said, "I wish she would just let us hold her and touch her while she went to sleep." And he responded, "Huh!" with a big smirk on his face. I knew what he meant: his dear wife (me) does not like ANYTHING touching her (not his part of the comforter, no body parts that aren't mine, and basically nothing that is not a part of my body). Shane tells me (often) that I have to have a neutral zone around me when I go to sleep. He admonishes me that the neutral zone is on "his" half of the bed, while I still get "my" full half. So when I expressed frustration that Elizabeth didn't let us touch her, he just laughed. And I understood perfectly.

Shane and Humor

My husband is the funniest person I know.

Last night Shane and I were watching A Room with a View, a movie based on the novel by E. M. Forster. There was this one actor who was really skinny and had on a brown hat and when he appeared on screen the first time, Shane said, "That dude looks like the anorexic grandson of Panama Jack." Who comes up with stuff like that? Shane does.

And last week I was lying in bed (Shane had gotten up with our 6:00 a.m. riser--thank you!) when they both came in the room so Shane could start getting ready for work. I couldn't see Elizabeth but knew she had gone in our bathroom. I heard Shane saying, "No, Elizabeth, No," as he ran across the room to stop her from whatever she was about to do. There was a short pause and he said loudly, "Elizabeth, 'No' does not mean hurry; 'no' means STOP!." I guess she saw Daddy coming and wanted to do whatever she needed to do real quick before he caught her. I couldn't help but laughing out loud at his view of things. Too cute.

When I got married, I never knew how much humor would come into my life. And what's so sweet is that when I think he is the funniest are those moments when he doesn't even know it, when he's just being himself and giving his perspective on things. When he's trying to be funny or to make people laugh, sometimes it just comes off corny (Sorry, honey, but it's true.). I love those moments, too. Shane, thank you for all the laughs. You sure do make this journey called life one hilarious adventure.

Turning One

The backwards-facing car seat has been retired. The formula is gone. Bye-bye bottles; hello sippy cups. We still have the pacifier, the diapers, and the crib. Welcome whole milk, cheese, eggs, and other dairy products, as well as cake and ice cream (this weekend!). It's hard to believe, but our sweet Elizabeth is turning one.

Happy birthday, my beautiful baby. Thank you for an amazing year. Stay sweet, little one. I love you so much.

Teaching children, learning myself

I don't feel qualified to teach small children. I'm used to teaching older people, and to be honest, I'm much more comfortable with them. Part of my preference stems from the fact that I barely have any experience teaching younger kids (except one time in Abilene when I co-taught 3rd graders). But I also prefer teaching older people (teenagers, college students, adults) because we can delve deeper into the content of things, explore questions, and discuss more mature matters.

In the past few days, though, not only I have been challenged to get beyond my comfort zone and teach young children, but I have also been moved to re-think what teaching different age groups can teach me. As I said in a previous post, Wednesday night I taught 4 year-olds through 6th grade (A large age-span, which proved rather difficult) about how God was in charge of the events when Moses and Aaron went to see Pharaoh and how he took care of his people. I enjoyed the teaching but was really nervous throughout and don't think I did very well. I had a hard time figuring out what level these children were on and what was too much information for them or too far above their heads. But God gave me the courage and I persevered.

And then last night VBS began at our church and not only was I an actor (at which I am also VERY bad!), but I also taught four different groups of children. I was dressed up as the Samaritan woman that met Jesus at the well, and I told my story of "Encountering Jesus," our theme for VBS. I really had a good time with it, even though I was nervous and a little edgy. The experience was really nice for me. I learned more about this story than I had ever really thought about before, or that I even knew was there. When you lay things out in simple terms for children, you might even learn something yourself, or at least be reminded of the important things.

Amongst other things, I asked them, "After the woman met Jesus, do you know what she did?"
[Pause]
"She ran back to her village and told all her friends about Jesus, and they believed because she told them."

Isn't that the heart of the gospel? Loving God and loving people? The Samaritan woman got it. She met Jesus and was so changed by him that she wanted to share Him with others. Isn't that what we should do? When we get back to the basics, the simple concepts of faith, we can be reminded about the heart of the matter, the most important things. Sometimes children know more than I give them credit. Thank you, pure, sweet children of God. You have taught me so much.

“Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.”

Isn’t that how Muhammed Ali’s famous quote goes? Well, today, I would say, “Stung by a wasp and floated, danced, and jumped like a butterfly.” I walked out my front door and was met by two wasps, one went for my neck and the other found my cheek bone. Apparently they found a home in the wreath hanging on our front door and when I opened the door, I startled them from their restful slumber. Ouchie! I ran inside and iced it up. Luckily, the stingers didn't break off, so it just took some Advil and some time for me to feel better. I'm just glad Elizabeth wasn't with me.

*******************

I also got a call today from the English department at Baylor saying that my office was open for me to move in. The call came at a perfect time...when Elizabeth is gone. I had already boxed up most of my books, and so we loaded them up in the car and off we went to Waco. Once we got to Baylor and figured out where to park without getting towed, we started unloading. Dear sweet Shane trekked back and forth to the car in the HOT and HUMID weather loading up the dolly with my books. He worked in the heat while I worked in the air-conditioned office, unpacking the books and loading them on the shelves. I had it easy compared to him! I've been told that the offices are given in order of rank, and it's obvious I'm a newbie from the location, size, and look of my office: I'm on the 4th floor up in the raptures (5th actually, but there's a ground level, so they call it the 4th). I'll be getting a lot of exercise come August! I also have a window (as you can see in the first photo), but it's located at an angle on the ceiling so that it's more like a skylight than a window. I can only see the clouds, none of the beautiful Baylor campus. Oh well. My time will come, hopefully. But really, it's a very nice office. Spacious and cozy with a whole wall of bookshelves, every teacher's dream! Here are some pics from the move-in day. They even have my nameplate up!! "Dr. Kara Poe Alexander"...that sounds so official! Ha!

I also want to wish congratulations to my good friend, Beth, or should I say "Dr. Powell"??!! Way to go, friend. I knew you'd do it. 4 years of work has finally paid off. Congrats (from me and Shane).

Happy Times

My blog has been giving me troubles. I have looked through my notes over html (that I teach students) but cannot figure out why my sidebar isn't at the top of the page. I even switched templates and still to no avail. I'll keep trying to figure it out, but in the meantime, I thought I would post since I hadn't in almost a week. So, thanks for your patience, blog reader.

We had a nice 4th. We went to Lometa, Texas where Shane's grandparents live and spent time with Shane's family. I had never heard of Lometa before I married Shane but have always enjoyed our trip out to the ranch. Now that we live in Gatesville, Lometa is only a 50-minute drive from us, and we have enjoyed seeing Granbe and Pawpaw more in the past year. Elizabeth's
favorite event of the holiday was sitting on my lap in the back of Pawpaw's pick-up truck and going to feed the cows. Pawpaw honked and the cows came running.

As soon as Elizabeth figured out what was going on, she raised both of her arms above her head and started waving and giggling, uncontrollably. Those cows really excited her.

As you can see, once we came to a stop, she wanted down. She wanted to go play with the cows, but I was too stubborn to let her have her way this time. Hence, the upset, angry look on her face in the picture. She was not too happy with her mama!

Monday (the 3rd) was also my mom's birthday, which she spent attending parades, fireworks shows, and speeches with my dad. Being married to a politician and having a birthday on July 3rd obviously has its downside. No offense to you, Dad. It's just more fun to celebrae one birthday rather than the whole country's. Since we knew we wouldn't see Mom on her birthday, we took her out to dinner one night when we were in Galveston. Happy birthday, Mom.

What else have we been up to? Elizabeth has been sick with a cold, or allergies, or both, and so that's not been too fun for her. Her nose is constantly running, and she has had trouble sleeping. Hopefully, it will run its course and she'll be better soon. As we speak, she is on her way to Austin to spend some time with Granbarry and Granna (Shane's parents). Granna has been out of the country for a month and so we thought they needed to spend some time together. Hopefully her cold will be gone soon enough.

We were finally able to turn Elizabeth around in her car seat since she's over 20 pounds and turns 1 in a week. She's having the most fun looking out and seeing everything, and I'm glad to see her pretty face when I look back in the mirror.

We've also been to the $5 a carload drive-in here in Gatesville (with Elizabeth asleep in the backseat ) to see Click with Adam Sandler. We took Elizabeth to the zoo on Saturday and are enjoying this time together before I have to go back to work. It's been a good several days, happy times had by all.



Elizabeth has this thing right now where she wants to put on my sunglassess, Shane's hat, and anybody's shoes. Here is Miss Cool below.

Well, I'm off to teach Wednesday night class to children who's age range from kindergarten to sixth grade. This is my first time to ever teach kids this age, and I'm a little nervous. I'm used to 20-year-olds! Wish me luck!

Here are some other recent pics you can enjoy.

Elizabeth with Teddy.


Nana must have said something clever!


One happy girl.




These are happy times.

Technical Help, Please!

I need assistance from someone (anyone!) who can help me fix the problem with my blog: What is going on with the right sidebar and how do I fix it? I don't know html, but I noticed the sidebar changed when I added my cluster map at the bottom of the page. Any suggestions? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?!!!

11 months...just plain crazy?

If I were my mom (which in this case I'm glad I'm not), right now, I would have two children under the age of one year, two children who were not twins but who were born 11 months apart. My parents, for some reason they have never revealed, delivered another child 11 months after the first one. This means that when the first child was 9 weeks old (if I'm doing my math right), the second one was conceived. (Well, the second one was actually conceived when the first child was 11 weeks old. You know how they count!) Still, 9 weeks! Can you imagine? I can just picture this conversation:

Person: "How old is your child?"
Mom: "She's 3 months old."
Person: "Ahh. How precious."
Mom: "And, I'm pregnant with my second one."
Person: "Really? Did you all plan this?" (That's the same question I have asked on multiple occasions.)
I can picture my mom answering, "No, we didn't plan this. What do you think we are? Stupid?"

No, Mom, you aren't stupid. Even if it was an accident, the baby is no accident. Babies are never an accident, no matter what the adults think.

If you hadn't figured it out already, I am Child #2, born 11 months and 2 weeks after my sister Kim. I started thinking about this situation recently because three days ago Elizabeth turned the age that Kim was when I was born. Wow! I CANNOT imagine having another child yet. For that matter, I can't even imagine being pregnant again! Mom and Dad, what were you thinking?!! OK, you probably weren't thinking that you would get pregnant again so soon after the first. Did you cry when you found out? I think I would have and am perfectly fine if you did the same thing (even though I was the baby in the womb). How long did it take you to get adjusted to the thought of having another one so soon after your firstborn arrived? I'm sure you became excited about it, but wow. How could you NOT be so overwhelmed at first? You didn't have much time to think about it, so maybe it seemed normal to you. Normal?!! What's normal about that? (That's me on the left in the first pic. I'm on the right in the next 3 pics.)

So, my sister Kim and I are the same age for 17 days. This always threw some people for a loop (and caused a lot of laughter from other people who were glad it didn't happen to them). We used to get asked all the time if we were twins. We didn't look very much alike. I was chubby and she was thin. We both had blond hair, though. Maybe that's what it was.

At times I wondered if I were adopted because of how people reacted when we told them we were eleven months apart. It seemed so odd, so strange, so bizarre to have two children--not twins--under one year of age. That didn't happen, so I deducted that I was adopted. They told me I wasn't.

I would not want to be in my mom's situation, having a 3-day-old baby with sweet Elizabeth running around. However, I am so glad that this "accident," this "mistake," happened to my mom and dad because I wouldn't be here if they had been careful. I'm on the left in the one below.





The Poe kids (Kara, Kellee, Kurt, Kim)

By the way, all four of us are only 6 years apart. That's another thing I cannot imagine.

Two weeks late

No, I'm not pregnant. This title refers to the fact that Shane and I were finally able to celebrate our four year anniversary last night, only two weeks late. On our anniversary, June 15, Shane was in Abilene for class, and I was driving from Galveston to Gatesville. This was the first year we didn't see each other on our anniversary and from the looks of things, it looks like it will be this way for the next two years while he is working toward his D.Min. That's all right. Next year, we're planning a trip somewhere, which will be fun, and doesn't that saying go, "Better late than never."?

We drove to Temple and had my favorite type of food, Italian, at a quaint restaurant downtown called Pignetti's. We, along with several older people who like to eat early, walked in the restaurant at 5:00. We ate so early out of practical reasons, not because that is when we typically eat: the movie started at 7:00 and Elizabeth was with some friends of ours (thanks Steve and Kathy!), and we didn't want to have to barge in on them too late to pick up our child.

We enjoyed our time together celebrating our marriage and spending some time sans Elizabeth. It's much more difficult to plan for a night out since having a child. We saw The Break-Up and laughed throughout because some of their fights were like our own. You're probably thinking, "What? They fight?" No, we don't really "fight" per se, we just "discuss." :) At least that's what my parents always told me when they were having a "discussion." We had a great time. Happy anniversary, honey. I love you.

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On a different note, last Saturday the Poe side of the family gathered together for a surprise birthday party for my grandfather Pops who turned 80. It's always fun to get together with all the cousins and our kids. Pops and Dorrie had two children (Aunt Jayne and Dad) and each of them had 4 children and now there are 7 great-grandchildren, one on the way, and many more to come, Lordwilling. All this because two people fell in love.

Houstonians

It's been 12 years since I graduated from high school. 12 years! It's hard to believe it's been that long. That's as long as I was in school from first grade through twelfth, years that seemed to go inordinately slow at the time but that I didn't want to go fast either. I guess being back in Houston makes me think about growing up--school and church, yes--but mostly my friends who I met through these places. We went to church on Wednesday night when I got in at Bammel CofC (the church I grew up in, also affiliated with the school I attended, Northland Christian). I don't get to go to church here very often since I married a preacher and usually have to go back so he can work. It was nice to see a lot of old friends and some new ones, too. I even got to see my 10th-and 11th-grade English teacher, Chris Norwood, one of my all-time favorite teachers who was partly responsible for my interest in literature and writing. He moved to Tennessee after I graduated and has recently returned back to Northland to teach. His daughter Katie was baptized that night after church, and they were really excited about that. Congratulations to you. I also saw the mother of a good friend of mine who died in a car wreck after my senior year in high school. I can't believe it's been 12 years since dear Ally died. She was a year older than me (my sister Kim's age) and had finished her freshman year at Baylor when she fell asleep at the wheel and passed away. The anniversary of her death is next week, and I always think about and pray for her family during this time. Her experiences at Baylor were all I really knew about Baylor until recently when my interest grew deeper. I wonder what she would be like if she were alive today. I miss her a great deal. I also saw little Mallory Leigh Mitchen who is all grown up now and just finished her first year at ACU. I used to push her around her stroller at Disney World and now she's at my alma mater. What a beautiful woman she has become, inside and out. I also saw my sort-of in-laws (the Reaves and the Shoemakers). I say they are my "sort-of-in-laws" because both of my sisters (and my brother, too, actually) married people from the church we grew up in. Shane is the odd one out here. It seems like we're all related in a weird sort of way. Bob (Derek's dad) played with Elizabeth while she climbed all over the pulpit in the chapel. And Laura, Tara, and Tina (Anthony's sisters and Mom) just oohed and aahed over Elizabeth like they wanted their own little niece to cherish. They're going to be two wonderful aunts (and mothers) someday. I also spoke with a dear mentor of mine, Bobby Stephen, whose wisdom, gentle spirit, and kind heart has made such an impact on my own. It's sweet to see old friends.

Thursday, Mom, Elizabeth, and I got to go hear my cousin Lisa speak to the 39ers at Memorial Church of Christ where my grandparents (and my aunt Jayne) are members. Lisa is an occupational therapist, and she told all about how seniors should take caution to prevent broken bones. The whole talk was very interesting. Too bad I only got to hear the first 30 minutes of it since Elizabeth was chattering very LOUDLY, and so we went into a separate room and played.

Dad got in from Washington this afternoon and took us to eat delicious Mexican food at Pappasito's. Yum!! We don't have that type of food in Gatesville (no offense to El Tapatio!). Elizabeth loves spending time with Nana and Teddy. The Astros are playing the White Sox this weekend. Hopefully, these games will go better for the Astros than the World Series did. Kellee and Anthony live in Chicago. I wonder if they're going to any of the games. If so, you'd better be cheering for the H-town team! :) We have another big day tomorrow, but I can't write it here yet because it's a surprise for someone. After that, Elizabeth and I are headed home to see Shane. Elizabeth has only seen him 2 days out of 15, and we are missing him as bad as he is missing us.

On a different note: My mom is leaving Northland Christian, the school she has taught at for over 20 years, to teach in public schools closer to home and for other reasons. Mom, they are going to miss you so much. It's the end of an era. You have been a wonderful Christian influence on hundreds of kids over all these years. Thanks for driving that 45 minutes twice a day for this long, especially when all of us 4 kids were attending there. You made HUGE sacrifices for us so that we could go there. I know I'm speaking for Kim, Kurt, and Kellee when I say this: We are so proud of you! We love you.

I end this note somewhat melancholy and nostalgic but always forward-looking and hopeful. Thank you, God, for the blessings of family. Have a wonderful evening blog-readers. Take some time to say thanks for those you love.

Kara

His left foot

Shane has this habit when he is/we are trying to go to sleep of tapping his left foot several times on the mattress. This may not seem like a big deal, but to someone who sleeps in the same bed with this tapping left foot, it can be rather annoying and sleep prohibitive. Since we don’t have one of those beds where if you put a glass of water on the corner of it it won’t spill (like they advertise on those silly commercials with the woman jumping on the bed in her lingerie), I typically ask him to stop or I cover my foot over his foot. He usually apologizes, we laugh, and then we go to sleep with (hopefully) no more bed tapping.

Around 10:30 tonight, long after Elizabeth had gone to sleep, I went in to check on my little girl as I always do. As I gazed down at her, I thought to myself, “She’s the most precious thing in the world.” Then, suddenly, as I stared down at her, her foot started tapping that same recognizable beat. I Immediately came out of my daydreaming about my wonderful daughter to be consciously aware of her foot tapping five times in a row, her left foot. I immediately had to call Shane to share this news with him.

Who knew that such a trait would be genetic? It’s funny how we pass on interesting quirks about ourselves to our children, ones we didn’t even know we had until we got married and had such qualities pointed out to us. May your quirks flourish as Shane has in future generations of children. Only time will tell which of my quirks she will inherit. Unfortunately, she has quite a few in the mix!

I’ve taken a lot of pictures of Elizabeth these past two weeks with Shane gone (he’s in Abilene for his D.Min). I even took video of her, which we haven't done in months, unfortunately. Here are some of the things she has been up to:

Sporting a Mohawk

Trying on a cowboy hat in Wal-Mart

Surfing on the high chair tray Strolling in our backyard with Uncle ZachKissin' Mama

Sweeping the kitchen floor

Have a happy day!

Writers and Readers

Finding time to write has been difficult over the last few weeks. I thought that I could/would post two to three times a week when I began this blog, but I’m doing well to have one post every couple of weeks. I want to be personal, thoughtful, creative, clever—characteristics that making writing fun to read--and enjoyable for the reader--but when I sit down to write, I don’t know what to say or how to say it. I stare at a blank screen thinking through what I want to say long before I start writing. I wonder who will read my words and what they will think. Will they merely scroll down and look for pictures, or will they read and reflect on the words as I do? Will they see the grammatical mistakes I make and think, “She’s a writing teacher?!!” Will they judge my writing and doubt my capabilities as a writer as I often do. Will they see me as a farce? What will my writing say about me to them? Will they really get what I’m trying to say? And who reads this anyway? What will they think? Who will leave comments? What will they say? These are some things—insecurities if you may—that I ponder as I sit down to write; they are the same things that keep me from writing. In spite of my fears, I feel I must write, for through writing I learn what I think. I can explore what my experiences might mean for me at any given moment. I can get my words down on paper. Later, I can read back through these posts and read the experiences in different ways. Writing allows me to chronicle my life, a life that is unique not because others haven’t shared similar experiences and feelings; but rather a life that is unique because it is mine. I have my own interpretations of my experiences; you may have your own. And it is this interaction between writer and reader that makes writing readable. It is why I read the texts of others, and it is why I hope mine is read.

Our little daredevil

Elizabeth is a climber. A few days ago, Shane caught her red-handed trying to thrust herself over the walls of her crib. He also caught her standing up in the seat of her rocking chair, holding on to the back of it, rocking back and forth. She has also climbed on top of a portable file cabinet, only to find herself stuck on top, not sure how to get back down. But the most surprising climb of all came last night...During bathtime, I turned to put something in the closet, and when I turned back around to the tub, Elizabeth was standing on the bathmat outside of the tub. She didn't cry or make a sound. The only thing giving her away was a big red mark on the center of her forehead. I'm not sure how she did it, but I couldn't believe it when she tried to get back into the tub. This girl is fearless. What's in our future? Broken bones? Hospital visits? World-class hiking? Maybe she can major in rock climbing. Today I also caught her in the same chair Shane caught her in, the same one he moved out of the living room so that she couldn't climb and hurt herself. I was able to snap some pics. Take a look at our little daredevil....OK. I am writing this AFTER I tried unsuccessfuly uploading these images. I'll try again later.
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Last week I got together with my college roomies from 1017 Washington. We met at Alison's house and had a great time. I hadn't seen these friends since my wedding (and not much then!), and we had a great time catching up, reminiscing, and talking about the future. Here are some pics from that day. I was going to write something more about the experience, but I have been trying to post on here all day long and have not been able to. Now, I am ready to be finished. Cheers.

Bye-Bye Miserable May!

Many of you know how much I love baseball. Well, actually, that's probably not completely true. Yes, I am a fan of the game, but moreso, I am an Astros fan. Growing up in Houston allowed me to watch them on a daily basis. I even remember when they almost made it to the World Series in 86. I was 10-years-old at the time, and I distinctly remember being at soccer practice one day during one of the games (for some odd reason soccer was scheduled during such an important moment--maybe it was a game. My memory fails me!). I wanted to keep up with the score and much to my delight, I was able to keep up with the game through the shouts and cheers of the prisoners who were watching the game inside the jail, which just happened to be located next to these playing fields. Kinda scary, now that I think about it.

Anyway, I have enjoyed following the Astros since I was a young girl. On a side note, being a fan of Bagwell and Biggio was one of the first things my husband says attracted him to me. What does that say?!!! Well, one thing I have learned in all these years of watching them is that the Astros forget what it means to WIN in the month of May. Perhaps May should be deleted from the baseball calendar. Or from the entire calendar all together. The Astros take that month off anyway, so why not just remove it? Or better yet, the team should just take a month's worth of vacation and refuse to play. They stink it up so bad anyway. Maybe then they could keep their winning record and not lose 16 out of 18 games in one month. Shane and I were able to see one of the FEW games the Astros won in the month of May at RFK Stadium in D.C. Cool.

I shouldn't be too skeptical. Last year they were worse off than this and they went to the World Series. Who knows what could happen now? But, Roger, oh Roger, I ask you this: Why couldn't you have signed sooner?!! Oh, how things would be different. NOT! Not even Roger Clemens can help the Astros during the month of May.

I am thankful that May has gone bye-bye.

Life in Washington, D.C.

I learned a lot this week during Shane's and my visit to our nation's capital. I learned that not all of the First Lady's were wives of the Presidents: one was a niece, another was a daughter, and still another was a wife of a different President (Dolley Madison is listed as Thomas Jefferson's First Lady and was married to James Madison--interesting, for sure). I also learned about (and saw) a fabled bathtub in which a senator supposedly froze to death in the early 1900s. In case you ever wander down there (ha ha), it's located in the basement of the Capitol under the Senate chambers. After about 20 minutes of wandering and asking numerous people where it is, you will find it in the back of a maintenance room after you crawl up and down steps and through a small space. It's all highly suspicious, but kinda cute.

I digress...I also learned that you don't have to wait in long lines when your dad's a Congressman. And that he can get you into really, really cool places that you didn't even know you were missing out on before. I also noticed that everyone (really!) wears suits everyday. That Congress is in session late into the night and that my dad works way very, very hard. That the country is run by 22-year-old interns. That everyone is important in D.C., even us. That my Texas legs are not used to walking as much as those people do up there. That Howard Dean is really short and that pink is a good color on Hillary Clinton. That the Astros are fun to watch, even when the stadium (Robert F. Kennedy) is old and run-down. And many other things, of course.

But mostly I learned that I am so thankful that I do not live in that world. I could have (or at least I thought about it). I almost went to law school. I also applied for teaching jobs in that area. I also thought about interning up there. But I am so glad I didn't. Because up there, life is run by the clock. And it's a clock that keeps ticking and ticking, and ticks quickly. This clock guides every decision you make: whether you can or can't go to church, how long you can eat somewhere, what time you get up and what time you go to bed, how long you work, who you talk to, what you do. And once the day is over, the clock starts again. Go, go, go. No breaks. No time to pray. And if you stop to breathe, then you get left behind (or defeated in the election as is often the case). It is a life I do not covet and even regret that some people (like my dad) have to live that way.

Even though down here the clock keeps ticking and I, too, live by it to an extent, I still have free will and the option to do things that I want to do WITHOUT looking at the clock for guidance and purpose. Down here, I hope the Lord determines my path. I try to fit myself into his time and purpose rather than him into mine. Though I love to travel and experience new people and places, I also come back home with a newfound appreciation of my own life, in particular, the relaxed, easygoing days I am able to spend in the here and now because I live in a place that is not quite so rushed.

Our First Swim

Elizabeth has liked the bathtub for a long time now. She even liked the kiddie swimming pool she swam in the weekend we met my nephew, Jackson Theodore Poe (What a cutie!). Well, Elizabeth didn't actually swim in that pool; she really just stood up in the water the whole time (her favorite thing to do in the tub lately, too), with the water up to her ankles, playing with the toys in her hands, and laughing all the while.

But finally today, she swam in a "real" pool. She and I went swimming (along with her grandparents and Uncle Zach) and had a great time. She loved the water and kicked and flapped her arms as I dragged her around the pool.


Isn't she cute?!!


She even jumped to me from the pool's edge and wanted to do it again and again, until she got too much water in her lungs and had to give a good long "Daddy burp" (That's what Shane likes to call those long, guttural ones!). I hadn't heard one of those in a long time. She was especially confused when I went under water, swam over to her, and then popped up out of the blue. She giggled when she figured out what was going on.

Hope you enjoy the pictures from our fun day. I have learned what a sweet blessing it is to have a child.

Even when moments aren't quite as sweet as swimming with my little tadpole. As in those times when she is more destructive (See Shane's blog as evidence of this) and stubborn (which we don't blame her for since she came by THAT honestly). :) These traits are still somewhat cute now but starting to get more dangerous. Yesterday I had to put her in "time-out" for grabbing knives out of the dishwasher as I was unloading it! I'm just glad she didn't get hurt. At least we are full of laughter these days. She sure does make us smile. I will look back on these times as some very sweet and happy moments. Oh, what a wonderful life this is that I'm living. I hope you have gotten your "word's worth" on this, my very first, blog post. :)

Kara